The Players

OK, so I've tried writing journals for my kids, but haven't been able to follow through too well, so I'm thinking that perhaps I'll be able to maintain a blog since I can sneak a couple minutes on the laptop a lot easier than I can grab the journals. Since this is my first entry, perhaps an introduction to some of the main 'players' in my life is in order.

Me, straight from my facebook profile: (OK, first blogspot lesson - cannot cut and past from facebook - so noted) So, my name is Jessica, and I'm just your average 31-year-old Jersey Girl. I'm lucky to be married to the best man in the world! We're raising 2 wonderful boys together. I am simply the most indecisive person in the world and the worst speller out there (does blogspot have spell check?) I work as a Legal Secretary in the NJ Attorney General's Office. Since returning to work after Nick was born, I've been assigned to the Sexually Violent Predators task force and also do Medicaid reimbursement work. I work with wonderful people and that makes up for the horrible subject matter most of the time. I am a State Employee and, though most people out there don't believe we exist, I'm a State Employee who works my butt off and earns my paycheck. I used to get upset about how horribly we're viewed, but knowing I have a good work ethic and that I provide a great public service by helping keep sexual predators off the street is enough for me these days - most of the time anyway. I believe I really am a good friend, I'm a great listener and I love deeply. I am one of the most understanding people out there, so I really don't hold a grudge for too long. I also have a mild case of OCD and I will admit, I'm way too lazy for my own good, but I make an effort to ignore my lazy instincts and move about as much as I can.

My Husband - His name is Shawn and I'm convinced he really is the best man in the world. OK, maybe not the best in the world, but certainly the best man for me. I'm lucky to be loved by him and thrilled that he allows me to love him. He knows me better than I know myself and loves me because of who I am, not in spite of it. My children are lucky to have him as a Daddy. He's the type of guy who will work a 12 hour day in 9 hours, come home and play with the boys all night, tuck the older boy in with a story and come downstairs and watch "Chopped" with me curled up on the couch. He will then apologize for not accomplishing enough in the day - right, because we're all super over achievers. He is an auto tech at Volvo of Princeton. I call him a yuppy mechanic now b/c he manages to work all day and come home with clean hands! Not that he doesn't work his butt off at the shop - this shop just gives him gloves. He loves his family and has no problem helping out around the house and with the kids. He also has a very, very unique sense of humor. I only hope that I'm able to capture some of it in future entries.

The Older Boy - Nick, what can I say about Nick? He's a force to be reckoned with all right. He's 4-years-old and full of energy, questions, explanations and stories. A friend of mine points out how he lives life to the fullest no matter what he's doing and enjoys every single aspect of whatever it is that he happens to be doing. She thinks of him every time she hears the song "I hope you dance". He has also been described as a tender-heart. He, like his mother, loves with all he has and is one of the funniest people I've ever met. He is an amazing big brother to The Little One. We thought bringing home a new baby would make Nick jealous and that he would act out and resent his little brother - it's the opposite. Nick frequently says things like, "Evan, I love you with all my heart and I'll never let anything bad happen to you. I'll never let the goblins come and take you away." Of course, this was said the morning after watching Labyrinth for the first time, but the sentiment is typical of Nick.

The Little One - Evan is our psychopath - and I really think I might mean that. He's 17-months old and has quite the evil streak in him. He also has this lovely snugly side to him that is super sweet, but more often than not, he's whacking his big brother in the head with one toy or another and then laughing about it. We're doing our best to ensure he doesn't grow up to be a vindictive prick, but man, it seems we have our work cut out for us. I don't mean to make it sound like I don't love my little monster with all my heart - I absolutely do, I just find it hysterical that he is 3 years younger than his big brother, but already seems to have more street smarts and acts more like the bossy big brother. I'm enjoying watching this dynamic unfold and am very curious how this will turn out as the kids grow. Evan was just promoted to the toddler room in his preschool and seems to be keeping up with the older kids quite well. They're starting potty training and have him drinking out of a normal cup already. Am I ready for my little boy to grow up so quickly? Not a chance. Do I think he's too young for such things? Without a doubt. Am I grateful that he has wonderful teachers who will help him grow and not hold him back b/c he's the baby in the family? Absolutely!

The Neighbors - I'm lucky enough to live directly next door to my parents. I bought the house next door to my childhood home. I'm thrilled to be so close to them and I believe my children are beyond lucky to have them as such a staple in their life. My parents respect my privacy and my marriage. They do not force themselves into our life ever, but are there anytime we need advice or assistance. I grew up spoiled and continue to be so. Living so close to my parents - who are now my children's grandparents - makes me wonder about the same thing that most people with children wonder.... who are these people and what did they do with the people who raised me. My mother has become the grandmother who pushes food on my children every time they enter her house. I'm not sure if she thinks we don't feed them at home or if they just simply like her food better (my father is an amazing cook, so their food usually is better, but still) or what the reasoning is, but it's funny to me that she always finds something for them to eat. She also caved and has allowed a toy box in her house. She told me when I was pregnant with Nick that there would be no 'baby things' left at her house since my house is so close. Shortly after his birth she had a porta-crib set up in the living room - we're now down to the toy box in the closet and a couple misc. things about the house. My father is beyond taken with my kids. Though it's funny, he'll often be heard saying things like "no running" when the children are in the yard. What young children don't run when they're outside? He cannot watch them for too long without having heart palpitations. Granted, gravity effects my children more than most people so they fall a lot, but mostly they're fine right thereafter and their spills have no long-term effects on anyone - anyone but my father. He becomes more paranoid with every bump, bruise and scrape. I don't even want to think about how bad it will be when Nick's big enough for skateboarding or whatever kids will be doing when he's old enough to risk his ivory skin to join them. All in all, their home is a wonderful home for my kids to visit/trash on a very regular basis. I'm not sure who's luckiest in this set-up, the grandparents, the kids or me and hubby. I know we all benefit, so I don't spend much time dissecting it too much.

Uncle Jim - My brother, until very recently, lived next door as well. He recently up and moved to Alaska. I envy his ability to do so. Not so much because my family ties me to home, but more because I would never have the balls to leave everything I know to go and explore the unknown like that. I respect people who can do that. I used to think my brother was evil to me growing up - he used to tell me that I was not really my parents' daughter, but rather was traded by gypsies for a half a gallon of orange juice. He would threaten to send me back to the gypsies quite frequently. He also told me that my parents got the raw end of the deal. Nice Jim, Nice! Anywho, now that I witness some of the shenanigans that Evan pulls, I realize that I could have had it much, much worse. Jim has always been the guy who never wanted to have children of his own. I was kind of afraid of how he would react to my children. He has surprised me and is very good with them. They miss their Uncle Jim very much. Jim is a walking encyclopedia of useless movie/music trivia. OK, wouldn't be useless if he could get onto "Remote Control" or something, but since that was cancelled decades ago... I believe my brother truly hated me from the time I learned to walk until I started getting him free drinks at the bar. Not that I ever really earned his love (I once maced him with Windex) but he really may have truly hated me. Weather or not he hated me, I'm sure he's always loved me. We've gotten to a point in our adult lives were we get along quite well. I admire his extensive knowledge - he knows things about things I didn't even know existed, and I'm glad to have him around (granted 5000 miles away is not really around, but you know what I mean). He is my older boy's God Father, was the Best Man at my wedding and has proven himself to be a wonderful big brother and brother-in-law!

There are many secondary characters in this life I'm living, but I'll have to introduce you to them as we go along. If you've bothered to read all this, I hope I haven't bored you too much too soon. If so, I promise that some of the stories that come out of my kids are worth having read this entry. My only real agenda here is to memorialize what it's like to live my life with my boys. If you get some laughs along the way, bonus!